When I decided to move to Idaho after college, I was excited. I was scared, but I was excited… It was a good job, I had just graduated college, and I thought I was ready for this next chapter in my life.
I was so wrong.
Now, I’ve been here for almost 3 years and I was thinking how much has changed since I began that cross country drive.
Not only is the world a different place, but I am as well.
And I can honestly say, even though it has undoubtedly been the hardest thing I’ve ever done, it’s also been the absolute best decision I’ve ever made.
It’s so hard to see that so much of who you are, and the things you believe, are solely because of the people you surround yourself with.
“You are the sum of the people you surround yourself with”
I believe this with my whole heart. If you are around negative, mean people, you will become one too. But if you are around people who support you and lift you up, that’s who you’ll become.
But when you move away, and you’re all alone, you get to decide who you surround yourself with, and what type of person you want to be. And not because it’s what everyone else thinks you should be doing, but simply because you know it’s what is right for you. Sometimes, you are only friends with people because you’ve always been friends with them… not because they are adding anything to your life.
So that’s number one, whether you need to move away to figure this out or not:
SPEND TIME WITH PEOPLE WHO FILL YOUR CUP, AND SPEND TIME DOING THINGS THAT BRING YOU JOY…
Number two:
BE PREPARED TO BE LONELY…
The only reason I moved here was for my job, and although now I have a lot of other hobbies and people and things going on in my life, that was not the case right away.
I was so lonely, the only people I knew were from work. I missed the familiarity of my room, my friends and my family.
But, in a way… that’s nice, because I got to decide what I liked doing, and what I didn’t. I got to figure out what type of person I wanted to be and what types of things I wanted to do.
It’s ironic, because now, I LOVE being alone. Please just give me 20 minutes after work to myself, I need to decompress.
Third:
IT’S GOING TO BE HARD…
I mean, working in journalism doesn’t pay a lot… at all, so not only will you be in a place that is new, and you will be lonely, but you will also be poor.
You also will be learning how to succeed at your job and let me be honest… you will be bad at it, very bad.
You will make mistakes, and you will be lonely, and you won’t have a lot of money… so yeah, it’s going to be really really hard.
But, that leads me to Number four:
REMEMBER WHY YOU WANTED TO GO INTO THIS FIELD/PROFESSION ETC…
On my worst days, when I would go home and cry and just want to give up, I didn’t…
For a lot of reasons, mostly because I believe life is hard, and if you can’t handle hard days, that’s on you.
“Life is tough, my darling, but so are you.”
I love telling stories, I love meeting new people and hearing about them and why they are the way they are. I love meeting people and thinking to myself, you are doing exactly what you were put on this earth to do.
I love it, and the good days far outweigh the bad… but it is hard, it’s so very hard.
Wow, already on number five:
ACCEPT THE FACT THAT YOUR LIFE ISN’T ALWAYS GOING TO GO HOW YOU PLANNED IT:
I’m not going to lie, I had a plan in my head when I moved to Idaho, to finish my two year contract and move on to another station… I always wanted to be a head anchor at a big station… but almost three years later, and I’m still here.
There are a lot of reasons why I chose to stay, but it really all comes down to the fact that you can have all these goals and plans and dreams for your life, but then things happen, and they change.
For example: 9 months into me living here, COVID-19 hit and I was forced to work from home.
I believe that “life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it.”
So, yes I wasn’t expecting to move to Idaho and like it, I wasn’t expecting to move to Idaho and meet my boyfriend, I wasn’t expecting to move to Idaho and for the entire world to shut down. But, it did. So what am I going to do about it?
Which is another reason why I think it’s good to be alone, and it’s good to be somewhere where no one else is impacting your decisions on how you react to it. Because you know it’s going to be your choice, and no one else’s.
Which leads me to number six:
TRUST YOUR GUT:
No one knows you like you.
So, when you are alone, and you feel in your heart or soul or gut that something isn’t right, listen to it, don’t take anyone else’s opinions into the matter, just listen to yourself. You know what feels right to you, and you know what the right choice is… you always will.
Seven:
HOLIDAYS NEVER GET EASIER:
It just sucks to work on holidays, there is no easy way to say that. We all do it, and we all hate it. The only bright side is, the people at the station will understand what you are going through on those days, and they will help you get through them.
Eight:
IT JUST TAKES TIME:
Everything takes time, it takes time to feel like you belong, it takes time to feel like you are good at your job, it takes time to make friends, it just takes time.
But while it’s hard, and while it seems like it’s never going to get any better, embrace that… embrace the hard… embrace the days where you mess up, learn from those mistakes, and don’t do it again… be a little better every day.
Life seems long, but it’s really not, and your job, your money, your “success” none of that matters in the end, I believe that with all my heart.
I can tell you with absolute certainty that what people remember about you isn’t any of that, it’s all about who you are, and how you made those people feel about themselves, and what you did for them that matters, I promise. Who you are… deep into your core, is the most beautiful thing of all.
So if you’re still reading this, I hope it helps you. I hope some senior in college about to move across the country for his/her first reporting job reads this and just remembers one piece of information, and maybe, just maybe it will help them.
Elizabeth Joy Hadley 