Thoughts with Liz

The other day my boyfriend Trevor and I went out to dinner at a local restaurant. We walked in around 5 and there were maybe 6 or so booths taken.

As we were walking towards our booth, I saw that one of the booths was taken by one woman. She was sitting alone.

I immediately remembered the time when my dad took my brother and I to the Ski and Snowboard expo in the Seaport in Boston. It had become our yearly tradition. We would go early on a Saturday and then afterwards we would go eat at the No Name Restaurant. Yes, that was the name of it. It was a delicious seafood restaurant right on the water.

When we went to sit down at the No Name Restaurant all those years ago, I saw a man siting alone. I said to my dad, “he’s all alone, I feel bad, you should talk to him.” I actually did feel really sad about it. I thought, how horrible that he has no one to go out to lunch with. He must be so lonely.

My dad turned around and started asking him if he too went to the ski and snowboard expo. They talked for a while. The man seemed excited that my dad was talking to him, and I remember thinking how sad it is that he didn’t have anyone to go out to eat with, no one to talk to, laugh with.

This past week the woman was eating alone and I thought again how sad it was that she didn’t have anyone to go out to eat with.

But, I’m older now and have had a lot more life experiences than all those years ago at the No Name Restaurant, so I thought, I don’t know her story. Maybe she’s on her way to work or heading home from work. Maybe she’s traveling for business. Maybe she likes being alone. She could be new to the area. After all, there aren’t any rules about eating alone at a restaurant, she could be perfectly content to enjoy her Mexican food by herself.

But, as I think about it more, it still makes me sad. It makes me sad because these people on both occasions didn’t have anyone they could call to go to dinner with, so they went alone.

And to be totally honest with you, most of the time, I feel very lonely in my life. I’m not lonely because I’m not surrounded by people, I seem to always be surrounded by someone.

I’m lonely because I have yet to meet anyone who is like me. I know a lot of people, sure, but I don’t know if I have anyone in my life that gets me, and understands me really. I’m not sure I ever will.

Anytime I try to explain how I feel or what I think, no one seems to truly understand what I mean.

So maybe, going out to dinner alone is better than being surrounded by people who don’t understand them. Maybe, it’s peaceful for them.

I hope they know I’m rooting for them, whoever they are, wherever they are. I wish only the best for them.